(c) 2009 Joan M. Newcomb
There was (and still is, available on Amazon) a great book in the 1980's by Terri Cole-Whittaker, called "What You Think of Me Is None Of My Business".
The title went through my head as I considered writing this Ezine article based on my experience of the last week (month, year, lifetime).
I've been in a growth space since returning from visiting my mother, compounded with having a cold for 10 days and having to work through it (solely medicated by Airborne; a miracle product). In the last week or so I've noticed I've been having an 'attack of killer gremlins".
Gremlins are one's automatic negative thoughts, never based on fact, that beset you with doubts and deter you from moving forward. They're your inner critic, or your subconscious yenta.
I've learned to not feed them (either by believing them or resisting them) so I rarely experience them any more. So it's been interesting to have them resurface at this time. And to notice the tact they're taking.
They've been taking me off on tangents about what other people must be saying about me. Which is really interesting, since it usually never occurs to me to wonder about that.
I have a friend/acquaintance who has cancer and there's been a guilty narration about how terrible I am to not be camping out at her doorstep caring for her. She called the other day and it turned out there's an army of people bringing her meals, fixing her house, handling her paperwork. Guilty (the 8th dwarf of Snow White's) was completely off base.
The other gremlin voices just want to run around and set people straight on rumors and gossip from years ago, which I never had an accurate read on in the first place. Even at the time knew it waste of energy running around trying to correct people's thinking.
What I realized a long time ago was that most people are too caught up in their own lives to even notice or have an opinion about yours. And if they *do* have an opinion, it reflects on them, not you.
Whenever you make a significant change, it will cause ripple effects. It's natural for prevalent patterns to try to stay intact or maintain the status quo. It will either be reflected through your inner thoughts or what you perceive people saying to you. However you don't have to take it seriously!
If you were rowing a boat and made a decision to turn in a different direction, would you feel like you'd done something wrong because the of pull of the water as you changed course?
It's all just energy, we just assign it importance because of the story line we've woven and the characters we've drawn to interact with us.
When you start listening to your Inner Being, and making intuitively based choices and actions, you'll be breaking out of all the old patterns. That will create ripples both externally in your current groups and internally (amongst your inner gremlins).
Keep moving forward. As you shift into your new level, either all your friends will change their tune, or all your friends will change!
If you're feeling overwhelmed, it's an indication that big changes are afoot. Keep moving forward. You'll break through the cloud cover into a bright blue sky of a new reality.
What other people think of you is none of your business. And what your inner gremlins think of you, well that's none of *their* business!