Friday, February 17, 2012

Consciously *NOT* Creating

Consciously Not Creating ©2012 Joan M. Newcomb 

It's okay just to drop things for a while and be.

Yesterday I was on an airplane, and remembered all the things I used to do to manifest a good trip.  I have techniques for blessing the journey's timeline, and even for shortening the duration.

The problem with all these techniques is that you can get overly burdened with trying to control every aspect of your reality.  

On the airplane, I realized I'd dropped all of that, and my main focus in the moment was whether to watch the movie.

Although I never saw them, I'm assuming there was a pilot and co-pilot flying the plane, an engine running the machine, air traffic controllers keeping track of things, etc.

It was kind of a relief to let them do their jobs.

It was kind of a relief to be on the plane, disconnected from my cell phone and the internet as well.

Everything else I'm to be responsible for had to wait.  If somebody died or something snafu'd, it was out of my hands.  I got to turn it over.

Turn it over to what?

Turn it over to other people to do their jobs, to a Higher Power or an Intelligence Greater than my (little) self to run things.  If someone dies, it's their time to go. Other people's lives are entirely up to them.

When it comes to children, it's an interesting mix - you have a little body who needs help eating and dressing, or transportation to school, so on that level you're responsible for their welfare.  But as an Infinite Being, they're in charge of their life and their storyline.  Another way of viewing it, is that their journey through life is between them and their Higher Power.

It can still be challenging to let them go when they're older; my youngest is on his college's junior year abroad, and had just left Turkey when political unrest and an earthquake occurred.  He's roamed through Africa and India since then, creating all sorts of experiences and memories.  His road trip is a lot more expanded than one I could ever have imagined.

I currently am caring for my mother who has Alzheimer's and Lung Cancer, a mixed blessing as she doesn't remember she has either of these fatal illnesses.  And she creates all sorts of excitement when I go out of town.

I'm doing the best I can to provide a safe space for her in her final months, the best quality of life with the least amount of discomfort.  

That's my intention, and I can set things up for that to happen.  And what really unfolds is her creation as an Infinite Being, between her and her Higher Power.

And for the rest of the weekend, I'm turning it over to home health aides, neighbors and relatives.

Taking a break, to Consciously *not* create, and just be.

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