Don't Apologize For Being Neutral ©2017 Joan M. Newcomb, CPC
There is a lot of emotional and mental noise in the world today. Things are really polarized. And there's a big message out there that if you aren't upset about something, there's something wrong with you!
Often, however, the more dramatic the scenario, the less likely it is to be true. It's more likely a distraction from something else really going on. Or is simply an indicator of a distorted perception.
97% of us grew up in dysfunctional homes. Many of us suffer from PTSD. When triggered, there's going to be a very, *big*, reaction. And, wow, there's a lot to react to in the news.
But how does it feel to react to all that's going on? How does it feel to be in the thick of it?
I find it really frustrating and painful. I had a lot of sleepless nights this time last year. It reminded me of the misogynism and narcissism of my childhood. My response, when I got old enough, was to fight back. In that scenario, I think I was the only one to leave without feeling like a victim, with a sense of power because I could stand up.
Yeah. That's a pattern that's not in present time.
My expanded perspective now, as Consciousness, is that anything that is negating, anything that is dramatic, is not the Truth. It is an entanglement of density. It emanates from bodies and personalities and is disconnected from Consciousness.
When I'm responding as Consciousness, I feel neutral. I don't get emotionally caught up in the stories. I have a bigger picture viewpoint. I see the greater Light of Consciousness shining in the world and exposing that which has been hidden in shadows. I see uncomfortable patterns rising to the surface to be cleared.
There's a valuable tool I learned when working with families and friends of alcoholics, and it's called 'detachment'. It's being able to detach, to not be emotionally affected by the alcoholic's behavior. When you stop responding to the chaos created by someone actively drinking, you can clearly see how you can adjust your own behavior. You can learn how to step back and let them have the consequences of their actions. It gives you the energy to take care of yourself instead.
Now, folks who are embroiled in the drama are going to get pissed off if you're not in the trenches with them. They'll accuse you of being disassociated, or frigid, or 'on the other side'.
But when you respond as Consciousness, you're able to not get drawn in. You don't need to apologize for being neutral.
Being neutral doesn't mean not having any feelings at all. But the feelings are even, not turbulent. Mostly as Consciousness, I feel compassionate, and even amused if it's really batshit crazy.
I've even felt sad about some situations. But as Consciousness I know things can get reversed in an instant. As Consciousness, I know that *everyone* is Consciousness, even if they're not currently acting like it.
As Consciousness I know that this lifetime happens in a blink of an eye. This, too, shall pass. They, too, shall pass. Things, and people, can change.
Responding, from neutral, is retaining your power as Consciousness. No one has authority over your internal space. You can make empowered choices as Consciousness. And that leads to an incredible sense of freedom.
Showing posts with label Drama. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Drama. Show all posts
Friday, October 27, 2017
Friday, May 8, 2015
Pure And Simple Happiness
Pure And Simple Happiness ©2015 Joan M. Newcomb
Whole Foods opened it's very first store in Tacoma yesterday and I was unbelievably happy. We've lived here for 18 months and I've been trekking to Seattle almost weekly for my organic fruits and veggies.
I could rave on about the store - it's enormous, it's bigger than the one in Rockville in the DC area where I'd shop when caring for my mom - but it isn't about the store, it's about the feeling.
It was pure and simple, childlike joy.
It surprised me, because, yeah, I like Whole Foods, and, yeah, I'm going to appreciate not schlepping up I-5 forty-five minutes each way to go shopping, but this just came in sideways. Which is what it's like when you're receiving from Consciousness.
Something like this happened a couple weeks ago as well. We went out to dinner for my birthday, and this same childlike joy came up. I mean, yeah, it was my birthday and yeah, it was a nice restaurant, but there was also a myriad of things that could have pissed me off (and has, in the past).
Instead these was this gleeful feeling, everything unfolding 'just for me'!
What's going on?
I think that I've cleared away enough rubble and clutter that my inner child feels safe to come out to play.
I've been strengthening my inner connection as Consciousness, and it's allowing this to come in.
I'm hesitant to say what's contributing to this, as I don't think there's one formula for finding happiness. I've had several times where I've experienced what I'd call a Spiritual Awakening. It's a feeling of being in love with the Universe, in love with my life, and in love with my Self (and not necessarily in that order).
I do know that it's come after a period of focused concentration, i.e. several weeks or months of meditation and energy work. I also know that it's gone away when I've lost my focus or gotten distracted (like getting into a new relationship).
What I can say is that it takes disengaging from outside drama. It takes detaching from other people's 'stuff'. It's choosing to keep your hands on the wheel of your own vehicle, and your eyes on the road of your own path.
The thing about happiness is that it doesn't come from a winning lottery ticket, or from having all your ducks in a row. You may not have learned all your lessons perfectly, or attained enlightenment. You can, however start experiencing happiness, right here, right now.
I do have some simple tools and techniques that I use, and that I've taught clients to use with great success. If you're interested, I'm going to be launching a new online training, click here to find out more!
What about you? What makes you happy? Or, what would make you happy? Leave me a comment and let me know!
Whole Foods opened it's very first store in Tacoma yesterday and I was unbelievably happy. We've lived here for 18 months and I've been trekking to Seattle almost weekly for my organic fruits and veggies.
I could rave on about the store - it's enormous, it's bigger than the one in Rockville in the DC area where I'd shop when caring for my mom - but it isn't about the store, it's about the feeling.
It was pure and simple, childlike joy.
| Happy Baby! |
It surprised me, because, yeah, I like Whole Foods, and, yeah, I'm going to appreciate not schlepping up I-5 forty-five minutes each way to go shopping, but this just came in sideways. Which is what it's like when you're receiving from Consciousness.
Something like this happened a couple weeks ago as well. We went out to dinner for my birthday, and this same childlike joy came up. I mean, yeah, it was my birthday and yeah, it was a nice restaurant, but there was also a myriad of things that could have pissed me off (and has, in the past).
Instead these was this gleeful feeling, everything unfolding 'just for me'!
What's going on?
I think that I've cleared away enough rubble and clutter that my inner child feels safe to come out to play.
I've been strengthening my inner connection as Consciousness, and it's allowing this to come in.
I'm hesitant to say what's contributing to this, as I don't think there's one formula for finding happiness. I've had several times where I've experienced what I'd call a Spiritual Awakening. It's a feeling of being in love with the Universe, in love with my life, and in love with my Self (and not necessarily in that order).
I do know that it's come after a period of focused concentration, i.e. several weeks or months of meditation and energy work. I also know that it's gone away when I've lost my focus or gotten distracted (like getting into a new relationship).
What I can say is that it takes disengaging from outside drama. It takes detaching from other people's 'stuff'. It's choosing to keep your hands on the wheel of your own vehicle, and your eyes on the road of your own path.
The thing about happiness is that it doesn't come from a winning lottery ticket, or from having all your ducks in a row. You may not have learned all your lessons perfectly, or attained enlightenment. You can, however start experiencing happiness, right here, right now.
I do have some simple tools and techniques that I use, and that I've taught clients to use with great success. If you're interested, I'm going to be launching a new online training, click here to find out more!
What about you? What makes you happy? Or, what would make you happy? Leave me a comment and let me know!
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