Running on Fumes

Running on Fumes ©2015 Joan M. Newcomb

On Monday I work up sick, and spent the first day walking around in amazement. I never get sick so I don't know what to do. If I have a headache or a sprained ankle, I forget to take aspirin.

The second day I asked someone what you do when you get sick.  They said 'rest,' a novel idea since I'd usually power through it.

The third day I drank ginger tea, which helped, and was tremendously productive.  Yesterday I was 100% better, but today I'm drinking ginger tea again.

Ginger Tea

When I look at the big picture, I can see where I've been overextending myself. In many ways and on many levels, I've simply run out of gas.

I just looked at the title of my post and realized 'fumes' can mean more than just fuel. I've carrying around grievances.

Fuming leaks energy.

Illness is a message to focus on your body, to do something differently.

I'm engaged in several kinds of start-ups that aren't yet yielding results.  When you begin something you can't expect to receive from it right away. It's like being a parent of a newborn.

My start-ups are 12-18 months old; I have a bunch of toddlers still in diapers.

When I look at my calendar for the week, 90% of my schedule is in service or action, 10% is receiving.  Imbalanced, to say the least.

I also notice that, although creativity is required in all my work, I'm not using my creative energy in a way that's nurturing or satisfying to me.  I have two or three books I've been meaning to write for years.

I'm not kvetching. I'm sharing this, suspecting that a few of you out there will resonate.

Where are you draining energy (emotionally, physically, financially, or otherwise)?

Where do you feel your creek beds are dry? Are they dammed up or dried up? What can reverse the flow?

Are you spinning your wheels? Are you stuck in a rut? What can give you traction?

Some ways to give yourself "juice":

Mini-moments of enjoyment. Pause to enjoy the sunshine, a flower, the view.

Take a total break. A movie or a book (unless you use TV or your Kindle to waste time normally), or a walk or a hike.

Ask for help.  It might be a simple as a brainstorming session with a friend, or hiring someone else to mow the lawn. You may discover your spouse/family/coworkers might be happy to pitch in, if you ask nicely!!

Meditate, pray, journal, energy work. If you're in the habit of any one of these, you may want to mix it up and try something else. You may find you need to strengthen other spiritual 'muscles'!

Try any of these for the next 7 days, and let me know what happens!

Dirty Thoughts

This is still a powerful time for setting your intentions, creating your visions, and making choices to bring them into reality.  What kind of choices are you making?  From what space are you making them?

Manifesting through reality paradigms.  A fancy, schmancy way of saying, you can't paint with old oils (or watercolors).  Or an old paint brush!

You can set any number of intentions, make vision boards up the wazoo, recite affirmations until the cows come home, but if you remain in the same energy patterns, then you'll always create the same outcomes.

You can even 'do a geographic', move to another city, change your looks, change jobs, change friends, but if your core pictures don't reset, you'll stay the same.

It doesn't matter what seeds you plant, if they're going in cement and watered with vinegar, you're not going to grow anything.

What creates fertile soil?  What creates growth?

Do something different, anything different.  You can start with microsteps.  Drive a different route to work.  Wear a different color than you're used to wearing.

After you pour your morning coffee, set the timer to 5 minutes, put the phone or tablet down, close your eyes and breathe.  Listen to sounds.  Feel sensations in your body.

I know a couple who, after they moved to a different city to retire, spent a week using their non-dominant hands to do things, whether it was to pick up the coffee cup in the morning, hold the phone to their ear, open doors, etc.  It was a way of resetting their experience in a new environment.

Microsteps are great ways to create new habits.  Set the timer to 15 minutes and clear the clutter in your office.  Stop when the timer goes off, and move to a different room (unless you're on a roll, then stay where you are).

I know two different authors who prolifically write books by microstepping.  One works 30 minutes at a time regardless of her busy schedule.  One has multiple books going at once and writes on whichever one moves her at the moment.

You have to bypass your brain.  It was your stinking thinking that got you into a rut in the first place.  Dirty thoughts create a murky reality.

Haven't given an assignment for a while: For the next 7 days, make different choices every day.  And see what happens!

And Now For Something Completely Different

And Now For Something Completely Different ©2014 Joan M. Newcomb

Think of something you want in your life.  Is it a new (or renewed) relationship, a successful career, more money, less weight, better health?

How would You have to be different?

Go For It!

Look back on your life, have you ever had that thing that you want?  What did it feel like?  What changed when you didn't have it anymore?  Maybe you've never had it, it's always been just out of reach.

You keep saying, 'oh I just wish I had' more money, but reject suggestions on how to create it.  It's too hard, it would take too much effort, you'd "sell out to The Man".

"I wish I had a relationship" and yet everything about your life keeps people out rather than lets someone in.  Really sharing intimacy is scary.  Being alone is like living in a house with no mirrors.

You never lost that 'baby weight', or all women gain weight at menopause, or powerful men (or women) carry more weight.  Being thin feels vulnerable.  Being thin means unwanted attention.

Health patterns, body gets sick, body has pain, body feels discomfort.  It's always been that way, my dad had the same problem, it's genetic.  No matter how hard I try, I can't... (fill in the blank).

If you had what you wanted, what would you lose?  Maybe your partner wouldn't take care of you anymore?  Maybe you wouldn't attract someone in your life to take care of you?

Maybe people wouldn't like you anymore if you were (whatever it is)?  You'd lose your friends.

Rich people are unconscious.  Wealthy people just care about their money.  You can't be spiritual and prosperous.

I can want that thing, but I can't have it because...

Argue for your limitation, and they're yours (Richard Bach).  Just because something has always been that way, doesn't mean it can't be different.

In order to have what you want in your life, you have to change your core identification.  Start thinking of yourself as a thin person.  An abundant and generous person.  Someone in partnership.

What does success feel like?

A couple decades ago, Shirley Maclaine was on the Oprah Winfrey show.  Oprah made a comment about weight and Shirley looked at her and said, if you want to lose weight, you'll have to want everything to be different (or words to that effect).  After that, Oprah turned into a stick.  It was her first bout with weight loss, and it wasn't healthy.

Then Oprah moved into a phase of running marathons, her weight stabilized.  She was at a place of gaining power and strength, both in body and in her life.

Then Oprah radically put on weight again.  She shared about having thyroid problems.  She probably entered menopause.  What was also happening, she was developing a network station (beyond just her TV show).  Her weight ballooned as she expanded into this new aspect of power in her life.

Now she's had her network for a while, it looks like her weight is going back down.

Oprah's a wonderful example of changing her reality, and bringing up core issues we all struggle with.

Whatever is most elusive in your life, you are propelling away from you in your beliefs.  You may be comfortable in your discomfort.  Misery is familiar, joy is not.

At the end of an energy session, I tell people to 'notice what is different'.  If you go, well that didn't change anything, you've reset yourself back to the state you were in when you walked in the door.

Healthy people made different choices (about food, about lifestyle, about...).  People in relationship share their lives, make space for someone in their world.

If you've never had whatever it is you want, you may not know what it feels like.  Be willing to step into the unfamiliar.  Open yourself to being different.

You may be in a family system, or a constellation of friends, that support the way you are, but not something functional or healthy.  Be willing for the old to fall away.  Maybe you can be a shining example for others to follow!

What would it take for you to have what you want?  Are you willing to go to any length to be healthy?

Maybe people in your life actually want you to be happy, or to have what it is you desire.  Notice if you deflect other's suggestions.

You claim you want to be thinner, people only see you eating salads, but not the ice cream in the middle of the night.

You bemoan being poor but never follow through on those help wanted ads on Craigs List.  A little voice in your head sabotages your efforts.  Who needs enemies when your own thoughts are doing such a good job at holding you back?

You can be thin after menopause, you can be healthy and people still like you, you can have money and free time as well.

Changing your reality is as simple as shifting states.  Step to one side or another, and you've stepped into a parallel reality where that is possible.  Notice what is different.

Notice when the 'Automatic Negative Thoughts' come up, and ignore them.  Don't feed the ANTs with your attention.

Healthy food tastes better.  Good men (or women) aren't so hard to find.  There's a perfect job out there with a wonderful work environment.

Shift your focus and you'll see all the new possibilities.

Make one change in your routine, take a walk after dinner instead of watching tv.  Have fruit for dessert.

Imagine the world wanting your success.  Your attaining what you desire encourages others to have it as well.

Whatever transformation you want, Your expanded self already is there.  Step into that new reality.

If it's earning or working, be different with your time.  Catch yourself on your 'time wasters' and spend 15 minutes tackling something on your 'to do' list.

If it's money, be different with your spending.  Start tracking your numbers, save receipts, look at where you are leaking money.  Clarity can be a big relief.

If it's food, write down everything you eat.  Make different choices.  Stop drinking anything with calories.  Choose water or tea with lemon.

If it's relationship, notice whether (or where) you hang out with other people.  If all you date are alcoholics, stop hanging out in bars!  Meet people for coffee rather than drinks!

Is there room in your life for someone, or is half of your bed piled high with books?

Yes, you've heard this all before, but nothing changes if you change nothing.  Stop spinning your wheels.

"The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off!" (Gloria Steinem)

Perhaps you have to get angry to get out of your rut!

Sometimes we claim we want something, and it's actually something else we really desire.  What would make you happy?

The Universe wants to give you what you're asking for.  Can you have it?

Sea Changes

Sea Changes ©2014 Joan M. Newcomb

I've been pondering evolutionary vs. instantaneous change.  Evolutionary change happens over time, you sometimes don't even notice it until you look back and realize you have become completely different. One thing happens after another, you respond or react, and you grow.

Instantaneous change is when your life changes in an instant.  You look into the eyes of your newborn child.  You win the lotto.  There's a tragic accident or natural disaster.

Growth is always happening, even if things appear stuck.  Stuckness grows, it just increases in density. Things may appear frozen, but many things are germinating beneath the surface (or in the unseen).

We like things to be easy and effortless, we want our changes to be pain-free.  Do you wait for the bandage to fall off, or do you rip it off?

Moving forward or staying still, are both actions.  Letting things happen or making things happen are both choices.

Accidents, disasters, sudden changes, are opportunities for growth and depth.  They can bring out the best in you, if you remain conscious.

You may not be able to control the event, but you can set your intention.  You may not know what's unfolding, nor how you'll get through it.  But you have access within you to the Cosmic Internet of all knowledge.

You are flowing in a current of the sea of life.  Sometimes you can pull up the oars and go with it, sometimes you need to paddle not to drift off course.  Sometimes a storm tosses you and takes you somewhere unexpected, to your next leg of your journey.

It's a waste of energy to complain about what's happening.  Resistance creates more of what you're resisting.  Complaining depletes creative resources.

You can't stop the ocean, you don't really want to.  Embrace the adventure.  When you look at the big picture, it's all supporting you to get where you want to grow.