Staying Present In Traumatic Times

Staying Present In Traumatic Times ©2017 Joan M. Newcomb, CPC

The last couple weeks were somewhat traumatic. First, my 15 year old dog had a seizure and possible stroke, and the next week a family member who has COPD (possibly emphysema) and MCI (mild cognitive problems) went into the hospital with pneumonia. It took be back to a time I've written about a lot, 2011-2013, with our other dog who had cancer and then neurological problems, and my mother who had Alzheimer's and lung cancer.

This recent period felt like a "pop quiz" reminder of what I learned then. Or perhaps continuing education, as there's always new awareness to be gleaned.

2010-2013 was a long, arduous process of ultimately midwifing my mother (my dog, and later my father) back to Spirit. Each of them had their own exiting process, each had different circumstances and choices to be made.

It's a shock when it first happens, and it's easy to feel that things are out of control. When my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's (right as we had finished paying off the dog's cancer surgery), it was a breakdown in my own reality as well.

However, for the most part, I remembered to keep a higher awareness, while external circumstances seemed to crumble. It would have been easy to have collapsed in a heap, but reframing reality helped. This was *not* a crisis but an event.

Joan and Dorothy, Washington DC, Sept. 2012

I reminded myself that I was powerless over events and other people's reactions to them, but not necessarily my own. I had choice over my actions (and response as best I could). I worked hard at being mindful, researching and asking for advice before making important decisions.

I also learned to not resist what is. I thought I could combat the Alzheimer's, get her into a memory program, give her the right nutrition, do my energetic healing, etc. But it was like trying to stop a river with outstretched fingers. When she was diagnosed with cancer, and the initial treatment didn't work, it shifted my focus to quality of life (rather than longevity).

It would have been a waste of energy to resist the little things, becoming my mother's parent, her eventually confusing me with her older sister who died in 1997.

It was important to stay focused on the important things (creating moments of joy for my mother). And to stay in present time, as I was back in my old home town that I left in 1981 and interacting with some people who hadn't talked to me in ten years.

I had to stay the grown up, the one responsible for life and death decisions, and do the next indicated thing that was best for all concerned.

This is all coming back to me as I observe my other dog age, and as this family member is navigating this part of their life path. It's different now, I'm only peripherally in this family member's life, and this current dog isn't doing so bad for 105 in people years.

We all have (at least) two parts to ourselves. The physical personality that reacts to situations and runs off of memories tinged with emotions. And the greater aspect of ourselves, Consciousness, that encompasses the bigger picture.

When you see things from that bigger picture viewpoint, and can let yourself as Consciousness be the one that makes decisions and takes action, it's so much easier to get through painful and traumatic times.

You're not in denial about what's happening, you can still be grieving the loss of what it was like before, but you're able to hold a bigger space, respond with greater inner authority.

We're in traumatic times even if our daily lives are going well. The world seems to be falling apart, when it's really Consciousness reorganizing reality.

Shift your perspective to Consciousness and you will inwardly know that all is very, very well.

Birthing Pains

©2011 Joan M. Newcomb


Yesterday was very energetically interesting.  I felt like I was high - on caffeine without the jitters. The top of my head (crown and sixth chakras) were very clear and open.  It was like a continuous flow of creative energy. I kept wondering who was 'in my space' - if it was a baby being or a woman who was pregnant.
 
My husband kept saying he felt a profound change, a deep transformation or clearing out. 
 
Then our stovetop blew up so we went out to dinner during a wind storm and when we got home the power was out. 
 
I had a bit of battery left on my laptop to send a few emails and as I was shutting it down I saw the first Twitter notifications of the earthquake in Japan.
 
Today the news has been filled with the Tsunami hitting around the Pacific, and my Facebook pages filled with postings to do with astrological predictions, Mayan calendar dates, and scientific reports.  Quite a lot of excitement!
 
One comment said "Birthing Pains for the New Earth," and reminded us to breathe.
 
The birth process is a great analogy for what we're collectively going through.  Birth doesn't just happen on a physical level, there's a spiritual and energetic experience at the same time.
 
Physically you have contractions, which aren't necessarily painful at first but hurt like an SOB when the head's coming out (I had two home births without medication).  You definitely have to breathe through it!  Energetically it's very powerful as the Being prepares to fully move into form (it's been there during the development of the foetus but it really 'moves in' when the baby body comes out).  The energy at a birth can be chaotic or euphoric or both.
 
The Earth has been having powerful contractions, with major earthquakes and volcanoes over the past year.  We're experienced the chaos resulting from these events and may have missed the euphoria.
 
Consciousness is moving more fully into form. Consciousness is the essence of who We are, all the different bodies and personalities are the manifestation of Consciousness.  From Consciousness' perspective, Consciousness is integrating more into bodies.  Our individual personality and body we may experience it as our Awareness is raising or we are 'waking up.
 
As this is happening, anything that is not in integrity with Consciousness is disintegrating and falling away.  We are experiencing 'earthquakes' in our personal lives.  Things we've identified with and relied upon are disintegrating.  Our careers, our investments, our relationships all seem to be falling apart.
 
People who identify with these things are experiencing the most pain.  And that which is "dying" is squawking the loudest.  People and things who have been limiting people's expansions are losing power, as we're seeing in the Middle East.  It's interesting to see the right wing extreme in the US attempt to impose more limitations and restrict basic rights.  They may seem to be 'winning' but they cannot prevent the inevitable expansion any more than a woman in labor can cross her legs and stop her birth.
 
With increased Consciousness there's increased responsibility.  This does not mean taking responsibility for others, nor accepting blame for events.  It means responding-to rather than reacting.  It means ownership of your own creations.  You are not a child and God is not the parent.  You are the Divine Being, senior in your own space.  It means taking responsibility for your inner power and use of it.
 
How do you get through the birth pains?  Breathe.  Allow support; spiritual midwives will show up in all sorts of guises.  Accept (because there's no going back when labor has started).  When you are in agreement with the changes, the process goes easier for you! 
 
View it from a Spiritual perspective and you'll find yourself excited rather than fearful.  Instead of trying to control the outcome, be curious about what possibilities await you.  Step up and out of your personal story and drama (and beyond the news and gossip) and see the bigger picture.  Open to the expansion and you'll have a quick and joyful birth.
 
Remember these suggestions over the next days and weeks and you'll have a lot more fun with your transformation.

The Bigger Picture ©2006 Joan M. McCabe

The Bigger Picture ©2006 Joan M. McCabe

Your life is a movie, created by you. You call in the players, determine whether it’s a drama or a comedy, and continue to write the story plot as you progress through your life. I think of the people who’ve come and gone within my own life as cast members, some have non-recurring roles, some occasionally guest star in intermittent episodes.

In movies on the screen, the bad guy is just an actor whose been hired to do the role. They play the villain, terrorize the victim, get shot by the good guy, and afterwards when the filming has stopped, everyone gets up, takes off their makeup, shakes hands and goes out for drinks.

And, believe it or not, the same thing happens in real life.

In the spiritual realm, there are no ethics, no right or wrong, no good or bad, no black and white. We come from this non-physical environment of complete acceptance and neutrality, jump into the physical realm to experience such things as density, effort, emotions, dichotomies, contrast, time, and space, learn a bit about how to navigate through such things, how to manifest into form, and then when we’re done we climb back out and into the pool of light and love.

Actually, we’re already there at the same time we’re in the physical realm, it’s just that our physical parts can’t easily comprehend both states at once. Our essential selves can – our essential selves Know that we’re continuously connected in both worlds.

Think of how being aware in this larger way can completely change your view of reality! People who you don’t like are simply cast members of your own show. Situations you don’t like are simply scenarios that you’ve written into your life-script through your own thoughts and beliefs.

I’m in the midst of planning my wedding, and my intention is that it be a healing experience, a coming together of family and friends, a celebration of love and joy and all good things in life. I’ve made steps in this direction by connecting with my fiancé’s family, and by connecting him with mine, and by connecting our mothers with each other, so that even though half of us live on opposite coasts, we’ll have a sense of getting along and good feelings with each other before all meeting before the event.

When compiling the guest list, I automatically invited a family member ‘because it was the right thing to do’ even though it didn’t ‘feel’ right. This person played the role of abuser in our family, terrorizing everyone and their behavior hasn’t really changed, it’s just less frequent as we don’t all live together any more.

When I received his letter responding to the invitation, I didn’t open it for three days, because I like to time when I’m going to be upset (I had clients to meet with, a class to teach, readings to give, and I like to be in a clear emotional space when doing these things).

As it turned out, they’re choosing not to attend my wedding, which is a great relief! Stepping back, I see that my fiancé and I have set an energy of love and community that hasn’t attracted someone who lives in a different vibratory level.

Stepping back even more and viewing the Bigger Picture, this person is actually a being of light that I was really excited about interacting with when my light came into physical form within this family grouping. They, however, already had accumulated an amount of contrast and disharmony and so our lights never really connected. Some years ago I realized that they never would during this lifetime. And that it was okay, because at the end of this film, when the cameras stop rolling, we’ll all get out of costumes and makeup and go out for drinks. On some level, we are doing that already.

My experience with people who have already passed is that I connect with their essence, not their personality. They become easier to talk with (even if they’re harder to hear). So it is with anyone in now physical form with challenging issues; we can talk about it after the cameras have stopped rolling.

I no longer see this world as a school with required lessons to learn in order to progress up through spiritual grade levels or hold the belief that if you don’t learn specific lessons you have to repeat the class again. That’s a very linear perception of spiritual reality. Not every issue needs to be resolved in this life time and it doesn’t necessarily carry over to any future life.

Life is about fine-tuning one’s focus and bringing desires into form. The only purpose any of us have is to create. I’m choosing to navigate into more pleasant experiences of reality, and I’m also at choice with whom I have as cast members in my Reality Show.