Creating Moments of Joy

Creating Moments of Joy ©2017 Joan M. Newcomb, CPC

When I was caring for my mother who had Alzheimer's, I got this book called "Creating Moments of Joy". It specifically focuses on being in the present moment with people with dementia and celebrating whatever happiness you can have, right here and now.

It was an enormous relief not to fight what was happening, but to dance with her memory loss and the resulting behavior as the filters broken down. We savored the moments, sitting in the sunshine and going for drives in the countryside.  And monthly field trips to the Kreeger museum that has a special program for people with memory loss and their caregivers. And, a couple times, before it became impossible, an evening at the theatre.

Those moments are highlights over the rest of that time, which was nearly unbearable, it was so painful. Yet when I look back, those are the times I remember the most, more than the others.

It seems to me life is a series of moments of joy, amongst times of challenges.

When we're little, we flow from one moment to the next. We find joy in dandelions and butterflies. We cry when we scrape our knee. We laugh at silly things.

As we get older we accumulate more 'scraped knees', and carry the experiences with us. Rather than picture books of happy times, we're galleries of war photos.

You can't move forward, with your evolution as Consciousness, with such density.

In stressful times, you need moments of joy. It's not being in denial about the awful things going on. It's coming up for air once in a while.

The worst is coming out of the woodwork right now because we're in a collective shift to a higher vibration of consciousness. It's in the process of being cleared, as it's exposed to more light it cannot fail to disintegrate.

It's painful to watch. It's reopening wounds, revisiting past trauma. Which is allowing us to heal our scar tissue. We can get through this by creating moments of joy.

Moments of joy can also redirect you out of misery. It doesn't take very long to shift longstanding patterns and introduces new experiences of reality. Abraham Hicks says it only takes 17 seconds. You catch your habitual thoughts and redirect them.

When I manifested my now husband, l did this. I realized I'd been driving around thinking of all the terrible relationships I'd had. Which was creating an energetic inventory for the next relationship. So I deliberately focused on the qualities I wanted instead, and he showed up.

By creating joyful moments, you can created more of them. You shift your attention to what you want (without resisting what you don't want), you bring it into existence.

There will always be things to resist. There will always be pain and unpleasantness. This planet is a dichotomy of beauty and ugliness, a playground of density and effort. We're here to create, to bring our unique vibrations, to feel the feelings of the physical realm.

What moments of joy can you create today? Be on the lookout for opportunities. As you notice them, more possibilities show up. You'll gradually rise up out of the current vibratory level to one of more wellbeing. And this has a ripple effect. It assists with the collective evolution. As more of us create moments of joy, the more joyous the world will become.

Adventures In Dementia and Effort

Adventures In Dementia and Effort ©2011 Joan M. Newcomb

I've talked a lot about how everything anyone has felt was solid and real is now disintegrating.  Solid investments like the stock market and real estate really aren't any more.  People who have identified with, such as their jobs or their marriages find themselves laid off or divorced.  People with strong spiritual beliefs are finding them called into question, and energetically aware people are finding their techniques aren't working any more.

This is forcing everyone to be in a new place, expand and evolve.

I've been visiting my mother in DC and I had felt something big would happen while I was here.  I had assumed it would be something created by Mother Nature (as other places have had earthquakes and tsunamis) and, while there were tornado watches here, we're quite a ways from Alabama.  We did have a couple of political earthquakes - the most recent was the killing of Usama Bin Laden.

What I couldn't have imagined was that my 85 year old mother would be diagnosed with Alzheimer's.

Wow.  She has more in common with Ronald Reagan than just being Republican!

Her personality is disintergrating.  Her memory is evaporating.  She's still mostly here, but not all there.

For someone who survived most of her adult life being in denial, what a way to go.  And at this moment it's pretty painless for her.  She doesn't remember the diagnosis, and I've given up reminding her.  Why bother, when she can't do anything about it?

For me, it's a wonderful spiritual exercise.  If I'm in the present moment with her, I can dance with where she's at.  I can phrase things in a way she'll accept, and I drop expectations of her being any other way.

It feels similar to having a toddler, because with a toddler you just give your life over to caring for them until they're old enough to go to school (yeah, it doesn't really stop there but you do have a bit more space for yourself by then)!  With dementia, it's in reverse as they will grow less capable rather than more.

But at three they are somewhat capable, but not as capable as *they* think they are.  So you let them make pretend cookies on a toy range, or scribble in crayon on a check register.  You step in to do the real thing for them.

At 85 and still early-onset, you can trust her to microwave dinner or boil water for coffee, but she's not up to steaming her vegetables or broiling salmon any more.  She writes all her checks in her check register, but she doesn't carry an accurate balance, and sometimes repeats entries on the following page.  And makes actual double payments or misses payments.  So it's time to step in.

Unlike most toddlers, who you can trust to be toilet trained and ready to go to preschool by a certain age, you don't know the progression (or regression, really) of Alzheimers.

So you don't predict, you stay in the moment, you make plans for the future, and remain realistic and open.

What a great way to approach life in general during these tumultuous times!  Is the economy turning around?  When will a new career or a new relationship happen?  When will things start to get better?

In the present moment, it already is better.  It is exactly as it is.  And a wonderful opportunity to open, to embrace, and to grow.

How can you come into acceptance if something extraordinarily shitty or painful is happening to you?  Scream, cry, yell, dive into and through it.  It's a storm front passing through.  It's labor pains - a contraction.  Let yourself be pushed into new Awareness. You are being birthed into the new Consciousness.

Your identity needs is expanding so rapidly, your aura has stretch marks!  Breath, relax, suck on ice chips and blow raspberries with your lips.

Life is an Adventure in Density and Effort (and for me, currently, Dementia and Alzheimer's).  We created this for the fun of it.  Sometimes muddy, sweaty, painful fun.  But as Expanded Beings we are bigger than any problem, we are more than our current knowing.

So, for the next week, let your self Be Here Now, Love What Is, Chop Wood, Carry Water, Do The Next Indicated Thing.

And see how your life transforms!