Respond-Ability ©2015 Joan M. Newcomb, CPC
Responsibility is such a heavy word. Being responsible can mean taking the blame or being at fault when things go wrong. Being responsible can mean that you're the only one being accountable for the success or failure an endeavor.
Suck it up. Put on your big girl panties.
Responsibility sounds like no fun at all.
Responsibility is the ability to respond. When something happens, you are at choice to respond or react.
When you're responding, you're taking clear headed action. When you're reacting, you're most likely emotionally engaging in other's dramas or projecting your own.
Reactions are usually unconscious. You can train yourself to stop and take a breath when triggered. Almost nothing needs to be responded to right away, you can take your time before choosing to respond.
Healers, coaches, and counselors can get stuck taking responsibility for others results. You can be the most caring and capable person in the world, but your client's outcomes are their responsibility. My most successful clients actually did the work, used the techniques, took powerful actions. They manifested their own miracles (with me cheering on the sidelines)!
Parents are prone to this as well, it's their fault if their children aren't living up to their expectations. I find the bigger the expectations, the more kids will underachieve. When you can step back and see your child as the capable creator of their own reality, you will be awed by what they can do.
The world won't come to an end when it's not on your shoulders any more.
In fact, when you stop taking responsibility for people and things outside your space, and start responding to what is within your own 'sphere of influence', your own life starts working so much better.
When you bring your energy back within your own boundaries, you become clear about your own dreams and desires, and have the energy to achieve them.
Respond-ability not only gives you energy and space, but also validates others as well.
It doesn't mean that you drop everything that you're doing, and dishes pile up in the sink. But you're able to do whatever you're doing from your own free will and without effort.
Try this for a week and see what happens!
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