You know when things just suck and you want to throw in the towel? Or maybe you're at a breaking point. Or maybe you are done, like, "stick a fork in me, I'm done!" kind of done.
Or maybe you've been stuck in indecision, or maybe you're stuck in persistence. That is, trying so hard for so long, but not wanting to give up trying.
How do you know if you need to keep slogging at it, or pivot in another direction?
Sometimes decisions require immediate action, and sometimes a solution needs to emerge.
Several months ago I felt like I was at a turning point. I felt burned out with what I was doing. I was wondering whether to quit this and become a hospice chaplain. I'd actually applied for chaplaincy training back in 2001 and backed out at the last minute. It's something I could do now, as a 'real world job' that wouldn't take the same energy my current calling requires. Or so I thought.
Then I got chosen to give a talk at Ignite Seattle, out of *lots* of applicants. Which felt like a nudge to continue.
Ignite Seattle happened just before a scheduled trip to Europe to visit my son, so I decided to let my decision "float" while I was gone. I thought I'd get inspiration while I was on vacation.
Instead, I came back to the same issue. The same feeling of burnout and frustration.
And then this week my 15 year old Corgi was diagnosed with cancer and we've been doing doggie home hospice for her. It's brought up a ton of feelings from 2013 when I helped our other dog, and both my parents, each die at home. And I got really clear about that part of the decision.
Emma dying on my kitchen floor helps me shut that door. No way do I want to work in hospice. Or hospitals, actually. So ditch that idea (what was I thinking)?!?
This reminds me of times where something happens that is the turning point, the straw that breaks the camel's back, when I wouldn't have let go or given up until then.
So instead of doing a summer chaplaincy training, I'm midwifing my dog to spirit. That's requiring a lot of focus, but it won't need to be sustained for a long time.
I still get energized by speaking and teaching, I'm still passionate about helping people transform. But the way I've been doing it needs to change.
In the old days a door would have slammed shut. In the old days bridges would have burned.
Navigating in this new Consciousness, is a more gentle way. Simply releasing the past and allowing the new path to appear.
So if you're struggling, if you feel like you are spinning your wheels, if you are stuck in a traffic jam or hitting a brick wall, stop. You don't have to blow up the blocks.
Just step back and let the scenario change. Or step into a parallel universe where it's already different.
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