Friday, January 27, 2012


(c) 2012 Joan M Newcomb

Last week I questioned 'Are We All One?', and concluded that, although as Essence we are, as form we are not (this planet is delicious with dichotomy)!

There are wonderful reasons for merging.  As infants, our bodies have just come from our mothers' wombs, we remain energetically merged so as best to communicate our needs (beyond crying, that is).  "Mother's intuition" is simply being attuned to our little one.

When I had my first child, I'd find myself being immediately hungry again, right after eating lunch.  It took me a while to realize that it was *his* hunger I was feeling (time to nurse, to feed him *his* lunch)!

After a while that kind of merging naturally fades, which is a good thing.  One can imagine how many extra meals would I have eaten, if it hadn't!

Falling in love is another good reason for merging.  One can't really love without being able to merge.  On the other hand, for a long-term, loving relationship, it helps to have 'spaces in your togetherness' (to paraphrase Khalil Gibran).

Most of us don't have a problem with merging.  We're not taught energetic techniques growing up.  As adults we bumble around with the energetic agility of a toddler.  We move into people's heads, match people's emotions, throw energy ("whack") instead of communicating disagreement.  There's no etiquette for energy behavior, since it's invisible.

People who are naturally sensitive deal with this onslaught by becoming isolated.  I call myself a 'learned extravert' when really I'm a natural empath (rather than an introvert).  I feel other's emotions, and occasionally have other people's thoughts (that is, I'll think something and moments later it comes out of someone else's mouth... which maybe could mean *they're* telepathic).

Although I learned techniques for separations in my early 20's, it's taken decades to actually begin to implement them.  I've remained open for messages from my children, and others get in on those communication lines.

In my experience, energy emanating from males has a lower vibration, and to a female feels like grief.  It's not always communicating sadness, it's just how a female body inteprets it.  Energy emanating from a female feels like guilt.  It's a higher vibration.  Male bodies are usually irritated by it.  Females often don't notice other female energy in their space, because it matches their own.  Plus, our own female body can make us feel guilty at least once a month (unless it's pregnant, when it's happy humming).

I have two sons, so I've gotten inundated with grief on a regular basis for 24 years.  However, I have three brothers, a father, an ex-husband and a present husband, so there have been some days I'm just a big, sodden sponge, without a clue as to which one is doing the communicating!

Recently I've realized that it's more effective to respond to the energy, rather than spend time figuring out who it is and what they are asking.  A simple way is to send whoever it is a healing.  Bless them, imagine shimmery gold energy coming down and surrounding them.  Connect them to whatever it is they want.  You can also imaging connecting them to the earth (reassuring for bodies) and connecting them to the sun (reassuring for Essence, and creates balance).

When we're in a group of people, we'll match the collective energy.  It's more noticiable if it's a temporary gathering, such as going home for the holidays or a family reunion.  If we've been a part of the group for a while, it's harder to define, such as working for a corporation or being part of a religious community.

If you like your family, if you enjoy your work place, then merging feels good.  If the holidays are stressful because of dysfunctional family patterns, or the company is undergoing a reorganization and layoffs are looming, it's a different story.

How can you be yourself, maintain your space, when surrounded by others?  Here are a few ideas:

If you're visual, imagine what color the group's main vibration looks like.  For instance, when I read people who work for Boeing, it's energy is a grayish green.  Corporations and the military often emanate shades of grey.  Imagine yourself surrounded in a bubble of your favorite color, or a lighter, brighter or clearer color.  It steps you up and out of the collective energy.

If you're empathic, that is you feel things emotionally, Amusement is a higher vibration which helps you separate from an uncomfortable group.  Something I do for weddings or temporary visits, is reframe the event as a movie (a comedy, specifically).  This works if you're going home for a funeral, just try not to laugh during the service. 

An exception to the above is if the collective energy itself is ungrounded and chaotic.  Amusement can still help, but you may want to imagine your feet magnetically connected to the Earth.  It brings your personal space into focus when everyone else is scattered.

Matrix-Quantum energy techniques are fun ways to instantly change your experience.  Step into a parallel universe that looks the same but is completely different.  I've done this to change the outcome of talking to a front desk manager when checking out of a hotel.  I stepped to one side, into a parallel Universe where the results were going to be successful.  You can step back and forth in one place and each movement shifts you to a different Universe. 

You can do this walking to a meeting (or to work from the parking lot or Metro stop).  Imagine walking through a series of opening & closing doors (like the beginning of the old '60's faux spy show, "Get Smart").  Each doorway opens to new universes of possibility.

Try any of these techniques whenever it occurs to you throughout this week, and see what happens!

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