Friday, March 2, 2012


(c) 2012 Joan M Newcomb

I had coffee the other day with a friend who was lamenting they weren't more assertive.  Somewhere in the conversation they mentioned that their mother wore the pants in the family.  "So you think you should be more like your mom?"

Thing is, she's more like her dad.  So the comparison invalidates who she really is, and her own unique way of being in the world.  Yes, she may need to learn to speak up for herself, but not the way her mother does it!

When we compare ourselves, or try to be like someone else, we diminish our power.

My mother reminisces about being in school choirs, and laments being an alto, or not getting lead parts in plays since she was too tall.  It's funny for me to hear, since I've always enjoyed harmonizing, so being an alto is a good thing!  I never played the lead either, but had a ball in multiple character roles.

The energy behind comparisons is competition, which stops creativity.  Competition places your attention outside of yourself, away from your Source.

When you're running a race, if you look to one side to see what the others are doing, they're passing you.

Ownership is the antidote to competition.  Own who you are and what you do and it stregthens you, contributes to your uniqueness.

Within you, you have all the resources you need to become anything you want.  That's pretty exciting to know.  Withdraw your focus from what others are doing and it opens the door to your own creativity, your inner power.

This week, notice when you're comparing yourself to others and redirect your focus to your own qualities and attributes.  Celebrate your differences, own your uniqueness.

You can do this with self talk (be your own cheer leader), you can do this through visualization (imaging all your energy drawing back to you from all the places outside of you.

Try this for the next 7 days and see what happens!

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