©2012 Joan M Newcomb
I've been experiencing some energetic (and email) ping-pong between someone who, I believe, crossed boundaries and *REALLY SHOULD TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR IT*.
First, someone else wrote them, taking responsibility for their side, and this person wrote back not taking any responsibility whatsoever.
I couldn't let it be, and a week later, wrote them, too. Their boundary-crossing created a lot of pain and suffering, and I felt they should know it!
Another week went by and this morning I get an email from *their sister* adding her two cents into the mix, making her sibling out to be the kind and compassionate one, and the rest of us were nuts.
Actually, I really liked the sister's email. It was filled with projections and distortions, as everyone's emails have been, but there was some nuggets of truth in there as well. And, really, I'm all about shining light on what is, and getting to the Truth.
So now, *I* want to write back and... this is getting really silly.
The thing is, under other circumstances, we could all have been friends. But things were done in secrecy, not in the open, and that wasn't cool. Or clean.
I could send evidence. I could show emails. I could correct their misperceptions. Or I could drop it, and get on with my life.
Because in reality, this has nothing to do with my main focus right now. Which is caring for my mother who is dying of cancer and, because of her Alzheimer's, doesn't know it. My intention is to give her the best quality of life for the remaining time she has left. So far she is stumping her doctors with her energy level (especially since it appears the cancer has spread), and out-talking everyone at the senior gatherings I take her to (something people on her Alzheimer's medicine usually don't do).
There are things more important than what someone in New Zealand thinks about me, or what they've said or done to violate boundaries.
This is one of those times when, looking back on it all, I'll be able to say this was the best thing to ever occur. Out of it comes greater healing, greater awareness, greater depth, than ever before.
Stuff like this happens that we never would have consciously asked for (or worked to manifest). It may seem the most cruel, or excruciating, thing to experience. And years later you're grateful for it.
Life is funny that way.
This week, notice the nuggets of Truth tucked amidst all the distortions. If you can't see them, pray for the Truth, imagine gold sunlight illuminating the situation. Step back and let the Truth come to the surface.
You'll be relieved when it does.
4 comments:
Joan, first I would like to say how great your blogs are. Next, I want to say you are a good person and your Mother is lucky to have had you in her life. Koodos to you for what you are doing. I know it must be hard to watch. My prayers go out for you and your Mother. And last, but certainly not least, I want to encourage you and others to let time pass and the truth will come out. You are the bigger, better person.
Lies are just the truth seen through distorted belief. How we react to what we feel is an injustice shows how much we have learned from life's journey. Allowing others the room to be who they need to be gives them time to choose right from wrong. We can only live the life we choose no matter how it turns out to be.
Thank you Joan!
Though I don't know what its like to have someone in my life who has Alzheimer's, however I do know what it is like to have a dying parent. I am in awe of your resolve to do the right thing by your mother and I want to send you a virtual hug.
I find people are ignorant and selfish when they don't know what they are talking about. You are a good person, and Kind honest heart. I will forever be greatful for you. Without you I'd be losing my mind and Thinking there was something terribly wrong with me. You are a good daughters as well. Prayers go out to you and your Mother. What people have to say IS hurtful. But don';t let it discorage you. :] Your fans Marco and Kapone.
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